DC Public Library System

Love's promises, how formal & informal contracts shape all kinds of families, Martha M. Ertman

eng

Includes bibliographical references and index

index present

non fiction

Love's promises

bibliography

889996795

Martha M. Ertman

Queer action/Queer ideas

how formal & informal contracts shape all kinds of families

"Blends memoir and legal cases to show how contracts can create family relationships In Love's Promises, law professor Martha Ertman delves into the legal cases, anecdotes, and history of family law to show that love comes in different packages--each shaped by different contracts--which family law should and sometimes does recognize. Beginning with Ertman's own story about becoming part of a family of two moms and a dad raising a child, she then shows that many people--straight and gay, married and single, related by adoption or by genetics--use contracts to shape relationships. These contracts and deals can be big, like vows of fidelity, or small, like "I cook and you clean." But regardless of scope, these deals can create, sustain, and modify family relationships. Insightful, accessible, and revelatory, Love's Promises lets readers in on the power of contracts and deals to support love in its various forms and to honor the different ways that individuals contribute to our daily lives. "--, Provided by publisher"Love & Contracts braids memoir with legal stories to show how contracts can complement loving relationships. Starting with a unique personal story about how I became one of two moms and a dad raising a child, it then shows that lots of people -- straight and gay, married and single, related by adoption or genetics - also use contracts and deals to create, sustain, modify, and, when necessary, end family relationships. Love comes in different packages, which I call Plan A and Plan B. Plan A - marriage, heterosexuality, and conceiving kids at home - is the most common way to be a family. But many people turn to Plan B --cohabitation, being gay, and having kids through reproductive technologies or adoption -- when law, luck or biology block Plan A. Plan B is just uncommon, not unnatural or unworthy of legal protection. But we should also notice the more informal, often implicit, arrangements I call deals. They can be big -- like vows of fidelity - or small, like I-cook-and-you-wash-up. Recognizing the role of contracts and deals in all kinds of families shows that law and society should and often does see Plan B as a morally neutral variation of plan A. Far from cold and calculating self-interest, these exchanges can demonstrate the kind of "us-ness" that makes a family"--, Provided by publisher